Saturday, December 13, 2014

Thoughts on Holidays

A couple of months ago Allen sent me a link to a blog entry titled 6 Things I Bet You Don't Know About Your Pastor's Wife. I've shared things like that on here before, so I won't beat the proverbial dead horse. However, there was one I would like to spend a few moments on. The number 5 'Thing' was:

5. Holidays are Lonely
In other words Christmas and Easter. They're Super Bowl moments for the church. They're 2 of the most likely times when people will come to church each year. So when everyone else is hanging with family and celebrating holidays together, my husband is at church. We don't get to travel and be with family. We don't get to be together on Christmas Eve.

This is indeed true. At least for us.
This year our church is hosting two Christmas Eve services; 4:00pm and 6:00pm. Allen will leave around 3:00. Maybe 3:15. He will get home around 8:00 right as the kids are going up to their rooms for reading time before the 8:30 lights out.
I remember one year when the kids were about 4 and 6 the church did three services, so Allen wouldn't be home until very late. I hadn't thought through the evening well, and on the way home from the Christmas Eve service the kids and I attended, the only place open was Golden Chick. I drove thru, got chicken strips and fries and a jug of sweet tea, and the kids and I ate on paper plates at the kitchen table and I put them to bed by myself. And then I had a small pity party.
We don't spend Christmas eve with family, because we have to be here, and my dad is also a pastor (in the Dallas area) and has to be at his church. The parents are driving down on Christmas day.

Please hear me: I'm not complaining. I know it sounds like I am. Five or six years ago when my kids where much younger I probably would've....or did. The holidays have been like this for almost as long as I can remember. I grew up in a pastor's home. I married a pastor. This is my life.

My point in all of this is to hear from other pastors' wives.

What do you do to make Christmas Eve (and while we're at it, Easter as it is much the same) special?

Do you save it all for Christmas Day?

Do you have a special Christmas Eve breakfast/brunch/lunch before your husband heads up to spend the last half of his day at church?

Does your family attend all the services (if there are multiples)to be kind of together, or do you pick the one that best fits you and/or your kids?

Some of you have told me that you're not able to comment, or it wants you to set up a google account and you don't want to. I think you can comment anonymously for free, but sign your name in the comment box so I know who you are....unless you want to remain anonymous. Then I will anonymously be annoyed. Kidding.
You can also email me your comment and unless you tell me otherwise, I'll paste it in the comment section myself.
This is just something I'm really curious about. That's why I'm being specific with the comment thing.
Let me hear from you!

Not sure if I will post again before 2015, so in the event I don't get another chance to say it...Merry Christmas!!


Anonymous said...

A long time ago, I sat down with my husband and simply said, "Your family is your first ministry. If you spend the entire day away from your family, then your ministry is compromised already."

Somehow our church has always found a way to survive without every pastor's family being abandoned at Christmas and Easter.

Lauren said...

I can appreciate your feelings and curiosity as to how others manage this. My husband and I are in our third year of ministry, and we do not have children. I, too, have struggled with knowing how to make our own Christmas traditions in light of worship services. Thus far, I've spent the whole evening up at church with my husband and try to kill time between Christmas Eve services. Perhaps it is all still new to me, but it does feel strange when we're not able to be with family. I'd say all our celebration and family time comes post-Christmas, and we've had years where family wasn't gathering until the first week of January (as my husband is not the only pastor in the family). Merry Christmas to you, too!